By Kenneth Stepp
Ever play the lottery? Getting to know some people isn’t much different. Some of our fellow travelers are simply risky to expose our hearts to. Does this diminish their value or chances of finding forever? Not a bit. It means things have to go slower. Honesty and building trust are two huge features in the path to having a real relationship with one of these special people. But before attempting to “enter” this world of him or her. Ask yourself. First. Is it worth it? Because it won’t be easy. Can I be totally honest with them? If not, you are wasting their time and yours. And does this have the opportunity to become a forever connection? If the answer is yes. This risk is a must take.
“A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for.”
― William G.T. Shedd
I believe us humans were made to love and be loved. It’s why I love Mr Shedd’s quote. Ships only find their purpose when taking a risk. At sea almost anything can happen. The ocean has claimed many vessels that seemed seaworthy enough. And in that same manner. This journey to find true love has taken it’s emotional toll on many great people along the way. Hearts are made to love. Hearts are made to be loved. But past hurts, damage, baggage, etc has changed the landscape in ways most of us never thought possible. I was in hot pursuit of a girl once a while back. She said something that has stuck in my head to this day. We were risky at best. It turns out she was right all along. For many reasons, that ship lies at the bottom of the ocean. Risky, yes. Potentially worth it, absolutely. What’s funny is that I still feel we have unfinished business. Some relationships stop without ending. Do you get that?
“So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?”
― Hunter S. Thompson
Happy… Another word with subjective meaning. Happy because we took the chance, or happy because it didn’t work out? Only she could answer these questions. I saw her recently. I still hold her in great admiration. I’m not happy it didn’t work out. But am very happy I took the chance. Do we just yell, “NEXT!” I hope not. But many do. They can be in and out of romantic entanglements faster than Wile E Coyote could strap a rocket on his back to catch up with the roadrunner. That canine really liked meat. I was a fan of that cartoon. So I mention it every now and again. A more tenacious pursuer never lived than him.
“Of course I’ll hurt you. Of course you’ll hurt me. Of course we will hurt each other. But this is the very condition of existence. To become spring, means accepting the risk of winter. To become presence, means accepting the risk of absence.” ― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
In the end. There will always be risks. There will always be pain, hurt, joy, and confusion. Some days they will all come as a package deal. Others. Seperately. My goal is to not give up on life. My goal is to find my forever love. My deepest desire is to have someone to share my life with. But the reality is. I’m risky. She wasn’t. I have a past. I have all the issues. Not her. So is my future one of “aloneness”? I hope not. One thing I am sure of. She’s going to have to be strong. And she’s going to have to love unconditionally. Of course, that’s my forever love and she will love me beyond my flaws, past, messes, and what others think. She’s amazing. That’s why I love her. Forgiveness… It’s what love does.
“Happiness is a risk. If you’re not a little scared, then you’re not doing it right.”
― Sarah Addison Allen